There and Back Again? Part 1
Part 1: The Call and the Need
You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. – Psalm 139:5
In J.R.R. Tolkien’s book The Hobbit, the main character, Bilbo Baggins, comfortable in his little hobbit hole in Hobbiton, is suddenly surprised by a knock on the door that would shake his whole life to the core and send him on the adventure of a lifetime. My wife, Pam, and I would also have described ourselves as homebodies, content with a peaceful life—when one day an idea was posed to us that would shake us to the core.
The call
In the fall of 2018 our pastor, James Faris, floated the idea of Pam and me going to South Sudan and joining the Cush 4 Christ (C4C) team. I laughed. Really? Go to Africa? At our ages? When I went home and mentioned it to Pam, she cried (overwhelmed by this possibility added to an unresolved extended family crisis). Later, Zach Smith invited us to consider being a part of their new C4C team, which was shifting from planting churches to establishing churches.
“Why and for how long?” I asked. The term would last about two years to assist them in ministry, including the provision of childcare, so both he and his wife could concentrate on language learning and get up to speed in the ministry of raising up and training church leaders.
“When will this be?” I asked. He said he would not be ready until he finished his seminary training and was ordained as a missionary pastor. He expected sometime in 2020. Okay, I thought to myself, we have some time to think about it.
Considering the call
My wife and I had a lot to think and pray about before committing to this call. But as we got more clarity of the need in South Sudan, we considered a proposed three-month exploratory visit before committing to a longer term, which would entail wrestling with the reality of leaving things here and going into a culture we knew little about. After a couple of months of prayer, talking to others, and counting the cost, we took a step of faith and agreed to go—but we’d be leaving in just two months!
Leaving became freeing
Once we made the decision—a leap of faith in the God of the impossible—things started to fall into place. This affirmed our decision to trust God for things left undone, things like figuring out what to do with our house and possessions, and handing off church responsibilities to others. Additionally, there were travel logistics, shots, passports, visas; for Pam there was the daily challenge of focused planning, packing, and considering how to leave the house in the care of others. In addition to this logistical challenges was the emotional challenge of preparing head, heart, and feet for a new culture and preparing to serve as members of a team we were yet to meet.
Self-evaluation and Doubt
I realized, when given an opportunity to serve the Lord in this unexpected way, doubts arose: “Why me? What do I/we have to offer?” After all, we were in our late 60s and had been married for 39 years; we were empty nesters with grandchildren and were planning to retire the next year.
Those we talked to said we had life experience that would benefit the mission, and that people our age are respected and trusted in that culture. We were told that the churches there have more women and children than men, so there was a big need to see God raise up more men who will follow Jesus and be discipled to lead his church.
As we thought more about it, we saw how the Lord had prepared us by involving us in cross-cultural experiences over the years and giving us a heart for overseas missions. We have both been overseas for various church- and work-related reasons; we participated in a homestay program with international students for several years while we raised our four children; we also piloted the Ambassadors for Christ cross-cultural training program directed by Vince Ward, leading up to this opportunity to go to South Sudan. Our work and church service experience would also prove handy in an environment that needed mechanical, technical, communication, and medical skills.
The hardest part was not necessarily going, but leaving our comfort zone in our home country. Once we committed to something bigger than ourselves, we experienced a mix of excitement and terror. Looking back now, I see that the Lord wanted us to grow in our faith in him to take care of us in ways we would never experience otherwise.
Confirmation, Resistance, Encouragement
In amazing ways, the Lord worked out everything to confirm our going to South Sudan from April to July, 2019—including our own children’s encouragement to go, finding someone to live in our house, and willing people to take on my church responsibilities while we were away.
However, there was some resistance mixed in to all these faith-building confirmations. It was during this time of preparation that twelve unexpected things at our home broke and needed either repair or replacement (for example, both our refrigerator and washer died within a week, and our apple tree gently fell on our house). It seemed to us, that by saying “yes, we’ll go,” we automatically walked onto a spiritual battlefield to be tested.
I found it strangely affirming that we left for Africa two days after we attended the memorial service for our church founder, Dr. Roy Blackwood—the one who discipled me as a college student and pointed me to King Jesus who promised that he will build his (worldwide) church and that the gates of hell shall not prevail against it (Matthew 16:18).
So, how did we mentally prepare to go to Africa in two months, and what lessons did we learn along the way? Read the next blog entry to read how we, feeling a bit like the hobbit Bilbo Baggins, sought the Lord to clearly show us whether he wanted us to go “There and Back Again” in South Sudan.
Dean F is husband of Pam, father of four children, and grandfather of five grandchildren. He is a ruling elder at Second Reformed Presbyterian Church in Indianapolis, IN, and recently joined the RPGM board.